I often take crew aside and ask them how they think
they did. In private they are quick to admit their faults
Some of them elaborate, and some just admit making a
mistake. I praise what they did well and stress the
concept of thinking ahead. I then make a few suggestions
on areas to practice. This sounds is very similar to what
you do Jon. Like you I sometimes take notes and hit them
with a list of things so I can get the bad news over quickly.

I always try to make people feel comfortable with me
as a skipper and I can think of only one time when one
girl tried to cover up her mistakes--I overheard her lying
on the phone to her boyfriend about what happened.

On the other hand, I personally have a problem crewing
for someone when I'm expected to be something between
the skipper and crew. My solution is to avoid such situations
and clearly define all roles on the boat.

So, what did you learn from this book Blink?

"Capt. JG" wrote

I think that the only way correct this situation, to be more objective, is
to do a tally at the end of the day, a formal list, of what a particular
person did well and didn't do well with, and then see what the balance
looks
like. I tend to go by my impression first, which is not necessarily a bad
thing, but it can be misleading if used exclusively or in excess.

One interesting side note to this is a book I strongly recommend. It's
called Blink: The power of thinking without really thinking, by Malcom
Gladwell. It's short enough to be read in a day or so, but has a lot to
say.