On Wed, 28 Mar 2007 10:56:06 -0600, "KLC Lewis"
wrote:


"Peter Hendra" wrote in message
.. .

Yes we have different laws here. Twice now I have been out walking
along the street (not in Penang) with my friends' Malay kids who were
staying with us for the holidays on the yacht, holding their hands
etc., when I have been accosted by the police as to what I was doing
with them and why was I holding my niece's hand (she was about 12 or
13 at the time) as I was obviously not a blood relative. The kids had
to say "But he's our uncle".

The papers sometimes have some delightful stories along the same lines
such as when a male police sergeant and a female constable were
charged with 'fraternisation' after being found in a hotel room. Their
story was that they were on surveilance. However, when the religious
police knocked on the door he opened it with only a towel around his
waist.

As I am of Greek ethnic origin, I embrace my friends - perfectly
acceptable in the Middle East and southern Europe. The Malays have
gotten used to me hugging them even though they only ever shake hands.
I am waiting for the religious police to haul me in on the matter.

You know of course that there are seperate supermarket check-out
queues for men amnd women in Kelantan state?

Love this country.

Peter

Peter,

Surely you've heard the expression, "When in Rome..."?

Hi Karin,
Yes I have and I usually do wherever I travel.

However, I have also found that people accept genuine actions from
those of other cultures. The people I work with and have close
association with know me well and accept that it is part of my
culture. A close friend has told me that they actually quite like the
gesture. Bear in mind that sometimes we are in close poximity, 24
hours a day for days on end on small boats and so you get quite close
to some of youir colleagues (no, not that close)and subsequently their
families. Don't get the idea that I rush up to everyone and grab
them. I usually only do it when I haven't seen them for a while or
when leaving for a period such as coming back to this boat such as I
do to my close friends and relations elsewhere. People don't cringe
but just reciprocate the gesture of affection.

Respect for other people's customs is as it should be but it does not
mean that you have to be blind about it. I have read and been told by
foreigners that one should never touch a Malay child's head for
example. I ruffle my neice's and nephews all the time and kiss them on
the forehead. It is not a matter of tolerating my behaviour but one of
accepting my ways as I accept theirs. I noticed after a while that my
son greeted older people by kissing their hand and touiching it to his
fiorehead as the other kids did. He never saw anything strange in it
and we certainly never told him to.

When I worked for China Telecom and attended meetings where foreign
business introduced themselves by presenting their business cards with
two hands, my Chinese colleagues usually made a remark in Chinese
about "another one who has attended the course" (on how to do business
in China). A dog does not eat grass so I passed mine over to the
visitors in return with one hand or pushed it across the table.

When it comes down to it, people are just people and it is far better
to just be yourself in a lot of situations. Others usually accept and
appreciate that.

cheers
Peter