Sailboat Trash Cruising Guide
 

I have read various cruising guides and many of them emphasize which
yacht clubs to visit, which restaurants have the best lobster bisque
(whatever the hell that is), which yards do the best varnish work,
etc. NOW, some of us just dont fit in at yacht clubs, Places with
names like "Ye Olde Downe Easte Lobster House" make me want to crave
molotov cocktails and I laugh myself as silly over seeing idiots
varnishing as I do over ppl cutting their lawns. So, for ppl who dont
know their PHRF rating and dont care, couldnt tell Spectra from
Lectra-San, and the only "Burgee" they would consider on their boat
would be the Stars 'n Bars, I want to write the "Sailboat Trash
Cruising Guide".
For convenience and cuz there are not yet many yachtish places yet, I
will start with the Florida Big Bend area such as Carabelle, Alligator
Harbor, Panacea, Shell Pt, Aucilla, Steinhatchee, etc. For
consideration in this guide, the place must be neglected by most other
guides, have at least one bar serving smoked mullet, cheese grits and
hush puppies, and be scary to anybody with varnished teak and
spotlessly white topsides. I will list OYSTER BOATS (how trashed out
they are), GUN RACK QUOTIENT (fraction of trucks with gun racks),
CREOSOTE PROBABILITY (probability that you will mar your sides on
creosoted pilings), and CHAW # (different kinds of chewing tobacco
they sell).

Sailboat Trash Cruising Guide
 

You can list this one on the Connecticut River. I don't think they even have
a coke machine. Fuel, mechanic, a few spare parts. Yup, they got it all!
http://www.oakleafmarina.com/



"Parallax" wrote in message
m...
I have read various cruising guides and many of them emphasize which
yacht clubs to visit, which restaurants have the best lobster bisque
(whatever the hell that is), which yards do the best varnish work,
etc. NOW, some of us just dont fit in at yacht clubs, Places with
names like "Ye Olde Downe Easte Lobster House" make me want to crave
molotov cocktails and I laugh myself as silly over seeing idiots
varnishing as I do over ppl cutting their lawns. So, for ppl who dont
know their PHRF rating and dont care, couldnt tell Spectra from
Lectra-San, and the only "Burgee" they would consider on their boat
would be the Stars 'n Bars, I want to write the "Sailboat Trash
Cruising Guide".
For convenience and cuz there are not yet many yachtish places yet, I
will start with the Florida Big Bend area such as Carabelle, Alligator
Harbor, Panacea, Shell Pt, Aucilla, Steinhatchee, etc. For
consideration in this guide, the place must be neglected by most other
guides, have at least one bar serving smoked mullet, cheese grits and
hush puppies, and be scary to anybody with varnished teak and
spotlessly white topsides. I will list OYSTER BOATS (how trashed out
they are), GUN RACK QUOTIENT (fraction of trucks with gun racks),
CREOSOTE PROBABILITY (probability that you will mar your sides on
creosoted pilings), and CHAW # (different kinds of chewing tobacco
they sell).

Sailboat Trash Cruising Guide
 

"whenindoubt" wrote in message . com...
You can list this one on the Connecticut River. I don't think they even have
a coke machine. Fuel, mechanic, a few spare parts. Yup, they got it all!
http://www.oakleafmarina.com/



"Parallax" wrote in message
m...
I have read various cruising guides and many of them emphasize which
yacht clubs to visit, which restaurants have the best lobster bisque
(whatever the hell that is), which yards do the best varnish work,
etc. NOW, some of us just dont fit in at yacht clubs, Places with
names like "Ye Olde Downe Easte Lobster House" make me want to crave
molotov cocktails and I laugh myself as silly over seeing idiots
varnishing as I do over ppl cutting their lawns. So, for ppl who dont
know their PHRF rating and dont care, couldnt tell Spectra from
Lectra-San, and the only "Burgee" they would consider on their boat
would be the Stars 'n Bars, I want to write the "Sailboat Trash
Cruising Guide".
For convenience and cuz there are not yet many yachtish places yet, I
will start with the Florida Big Bend area such as Carabelle, Alligator
Harbor, Panacea, Shell Pt, Aucilla, Steinhatchee, etc. For
consideration in this guide, the place must be neglected by most other
guides, have at least one bar serving smoked mullet, cheese grits and
hush puppies, and be scary to anybody with varnished teak and
spotlessly white topsides. I will list OYSTER BOATS (how trashed out
they are), GUN RACK QUOTIENT (fraction of trucks with gun racks),
CREOSOTE PROBABILITY (probability that you will mar your sides on
creosoted pilings), and CHAW # (different kinds of chewing tobacco
they sell).

Criteria I forgot about in my original post:

They gotta have Patsy Cline or Waylon Jennings songs on the jukebox in the bar.

Sailboat Trash Cruising Guide
 

Parallax wrote:

Criteria I forgot about in my original post:

They gotta have Patsy Cline or Waylon Jennings songs on the jukebox in the bar.

If we are talking about here in GA or South Carolina there are extra rules:

No more than 3' draft to the fuel dock at low tide. Minimum equipment
should consist of 5 video poker machines, 3 traditional pinballs and 2
coin operated prophilactic dispensers in the mens room. Any pump out
equipment must have been out of service for at least 6 months. Any
carpeted area in the bar should be slightly sticky and there should be a
paper mill no more than 5 miles up wind to cover the smell of rotting
beer and fish heads. If they have live music on Friday night the stage
must have a protective chicken wire screen.

--
Glenn Ashmore

I'm building a 45' cutter in strip/composite. Watch my progress (or lack
there of) at: http://www.rutuonline.com
Shameless Commercial Division: http://www.spade-anchor-us.com

Sailboat Trash Cruising Guide
 

On Mon, 20 Oct 2003 10:47:32 +0000, Parallax wrote:

I have read various cruising guides and many of them emphasize which
yacht clubs to visit, which restaurants have the best lobster bisque
(whatever the hell that is), which yards do the best varnish work,
etc. NOW, some of us just dont fit in at yacht clubs, Places with
names like "Ye Olde Downe Easte Lobster House" make me want to crave
molotov cocktails and I laugh myself as silly over seeing idiots
varnishing as I do over ppl cutting their lawns. So, for ppl who dont
know their PHRF rating and dont care, couldnt tell Spectra from
Lectra-San, and the only "Burgee" they would consider on their boat
would be the Stars 'n Bars, I want to write the "Sailboat Trash
Cruising Guide".
For convenience and cuz there are not yet many yachtish places yet, I
will start with the Florida Big Bend area such as Carabelle, Alligator
Harbor, Panacea, Shell Pt, Aucilla, Steinhatchee, etc. For
consideration in this guide, the place must be neglected by most other
guides, have at least one bar serving smoked mullet, cheese grits and
hush puppies, and be scary to anybody with varnished teak and
spotlessly white topsides. [SNIP]

I hear ya!

Trouble is, most of the spots I like don't HAVE a bar (or a fuel dock, or
a dock at all, for that matter...)

There's Scottie Bay at the north end of Lasquitti. There's a dock there,
but it's used by the fishermen to weld their boats. There's a restaurant
nearby ("The Tea House") that I'm told is excellent, but since it opens
"on a whim", I've never experienced it.

Gibson's used to be like that, but it's got all yuppy in recent years.
Years ago, I was having dinner at Gramma's Pub, a bunch of guys sat at the
table next to me, took their instruments out of their cases, and started
playing Bluegrass.

One night at Thetis Island Pub, the One-man band was going off-set, but
couldn't get his tape machine to work to play music while he was gone.
Half-jokingly, he said "anybody know any jokes?" Turns out one of the
waiters used to do standup, and he started it off. People came up from the
crowd, telling jokes all night long. The OMB never did come back on!

Then there's a whole pile of Great Anchorages that feature almost complete
solitude, but if I mentioned them they wouldn't be empty for long!

Lloyd Sumpter
"Far Cove" Catalina 36

Sailboat Trash Cruising Guide
 

"Parallax" wrote in message
om...
"whenindoubt" wrote in message
. com...
Criteria I forgot about in my original post:

They gotta have Patsy Cline or Waylon Jennings songs on the jukebox in the
bar.

Well if the UK is anything to go by, Patsy Cline playing means there will
probably be a large percentage of lesbians present. Is this another criteria
you want to apply?:-)

John

Sailboat Trash Cruising Guide
 

"Lloyd Sumpter" wrote in message ...
On Mon, 20 Oct 2003 10:47:32 +0000, Parallax wrote:

I have read various cruising guides and many of them emphasize which
yacht clubs to visit, which restaurants have the best lobster bisque
(whatever the hell that is), which yards do the best varnish work,
etc. NOW, some of us just dont fit in at yacht clubs, Places with
names like "Ye Olde Downe Easte Lobster House" make me want to crave
molotov cocktails and I laugh myself as silly over seeing idiots
varnishing as I do over ppl cutting their lawns. So, for ppl who dont
know their PHRF rating and dont care, couldnt tell Spectra from
Lectra-San, and the only "Burgee" they would consider on their boat
would be the Stars 'n Bars, I want to write the "Sailboat Trash
Cruising Guide".
For convenience and cuz there are not yet many yachtish places yet, I
will start with the Florida Big Bend area such as Carabelle, Alligator
Harbor, Panacea, Shell Pt, Aucilla, Steinhatchee, etc. For
consideration in this guide, the place must be neglected by most other
guides, have at least one bar serving smoked mullet, cheese grits and
hush puppies, and be scary to anybody with varnished teak and
spotlessly white topsides. [SNIP]

I hear ya!

Trouble is, most of the spots I like don't HAVE a bar (or a fuel dock, or
a dock at all, for that matter...)

There's Scottie Bay at the north end of Lasquitti. There's a dock there,
but it's used by the fishermen to weld their boats. There's a restaurant
nearby ("The Tea House") that I'm told is excellent, but since it opens
"on a whim", I've never experienced it.

Gibson's used to be like that, but it's got all yuppy in recent years.
Years ago, I was having dinner at Gramma's Pub, a bunch of guys sat at the
table next to me, took their instruments out of their cases, and started
playing Bluegrass.

One night at Thetis Island Pub, the One-man band was going off-set, but
couldn't get his tape machine to work to play music while he was gone.
Half-jokingly, he said "anybody know any jokes?" Turns out one of the
waiters used to do standup, and he started it off. People came up from the
crowd, telling jokes all night long. The OMB never did come back on!

Then there's a whole pile of Great Anchorages that feature almost complete
solitude, but if I mentioned them they wouldn't be empty for long!

Lloyd Sumpter
"Far Cove" Catalina 36

Lloyd, where are you anyway?
Glenn, I just thought those conditions were understood.

John, lesbians like Patsy Cline? Its a straneg world (strange too)

Sailboat Trash Cruising Guide
 

Lloyd Sumpter wrote:

One night at Thetis Island Pub, the One-man band was going off-set, but
couldn't get his tape machine to work to play music while he was gone.
Half-jokingly, he said "anybody know any jokes?" Turns out one of the
waiters used to do standup, and he started it off. People came up from the
crowd, telling jokes all night long. The OMB never did come back on!

Thetis Island Pub, as in Telegraph Harbo(u)r, BC? One of my favorite
spots in the Gulf Islands.



Then there's a whole pile of Great Anchorages that feature almost complete
solitude, but if I mentioned them they wouldn't be empty for long!


Awwww... :(

--
~/Garth
Almgren