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#1
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![]() The day after his wife disappeared In a kayaking accident, an Anchorage man answered his door to find two grim-faced Alaska State Troopers. "We're sorry Mr. Wilkens, but we have some information about your wife", said one of the troopers. "Tell me! Did you find her?", Wilkens exclaimed. The troopers looked at each other. One said, "We have some bad news, some good news, and some really great news. Which would you like to hear first?" Fearing the worst, Mr. Wilkens said, "Give me the bad news first." The trooper said, "I'm sorry to tell you, sir, but this morning we found your wife's body in Kachemak Bay .." "Oh my God!", exclaimed Wilkens. Swallowing hard, he asked, "What's the good news?" The trooper continued, "When we pulled her up, she had 12 twenty-five-pound king crabs and 6 good-sized Dungeness crabs clinging to her, and we feel you are entitled to a share in the catch." Stunned, Mr. Wilkens demanded, "If that's the good news, then what's the great news?" The trooper replied, "We're gonna pull her up again tomorrow." |
#2
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On Mon, 24 Mar 2014 11:10:51 -0400, H*a*r*r*o*l*d wrote:
The day after his wife disappeared In a kayaking accident, an Anchorage man answered his door to find two grim-faced Alaska State Troopers. "We're sorry Mr. Wilkens, but we have some information about your wife", said one of the troopers. "Tell me! Did you find her?", Wilkens exclaimed. The troopers looked at each other. One said, "We have some bad news, some good news, and some really great news. Which would you like to hear first?" Fearing the worst, Mr. Wilkens said, "Give me the bad news first." The trooper said, "I'm sorry to tell you, sir, but this morning we found your wife's body in Kachemak Bay .." "Oh my God!", exclaimed Wilkens. Swallowing hard, he asked, "What's the good news?" The trooper continued, "When we pulled her up, she had 12 twenty-five-pound king crabs and 6 good-sized Dungeness crabs clinging to her, and we feel you are entitled to a share in the catch." Stunned, Mr. Wilkens demanded, "If that's the good news, then what's the great news?" The trooper replied, "We're gonna pull her up again tomorrow." You know you'll be accused of sexism. You should have switched the man and the woman. But, it was funny as hell. |
#3
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On 3/24/14, 12:05 PM, Poquito Loco wrote:
On Mon, 24 Mar 2014 11:10:51 -0400, H*a*r*r*o*l*d wrote: The day after his wife disappeared In a kayaking accident, an Anchorage man answered his door to find two grim-faced Alaska State Troopers. "We're sorry Mr. Wilkens, but we have some information about your wife", said one of the troopers. "Tell me! Did you find her?", Wilkens exclaimed. The troopers looked at each other. One said, "We have some bad news, some good news, and some really great news. Which would you like to hear first?" Fearing the worst, Mr. Wilkens said, "Give me the bad news first." The trooper said, "I'm sorry to tell you, sir, but this morning we found your wife's body in Kachemak Bay .." "Oh my God!", exclaimed Wilkens. Swallowing hard, he asked, "What's the good news?" The trooper continued, "When we pulled her up, she had 12 twenty-five-pound king crabs and 6 good-sized Dungeness crabs clinging to her, and we feel you are entitled to a share in the catch." Stunned, Mr. Wilkens demanded, "If that's the good news, then what's the great news?" The trooper replied, "We're gonna pull her up again tomorrow." You know you'll be accused of sexism. You should have switched the man and the woman. But, it was funny as hell. Sexist assholes, both of you. I know 25 or 30 women who individually have accomplished more in life than you boys put together. -- Rand Paul & Ted Cruz…your 2016 GOP nominees, because ‘Mericans deserve crazy! |
#4
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On Monday, March 24, 2014 6:44:59 PM UTC-4, F*O*A*D wrote:
On 3/24/14, 12:05 PM, Poquito Loco wrote: On Mon, 24 Mar 2014 11:10:51 -0400, H*a*r*r*o*l*d wrote: The day after his wife disappeared In a kayaking accident, an Anchorage man answered his door to find two grim-faced Alaska State Troopers. "We're sorry Mr. Wilkens, but we have some information about your wife", said one of the troopers. "Tell me! Did you find her?", Wilkens exclaimed. The troopers looked at each other. One said, "We have some bad news, some good news, and some really great news. Which would you like to hear first?" Fearing the worst, Mr. Wilkens said, "Give me the bad news first." The trooper said, "I'm sorry to tell you, sir, but this morning we found your wife's body in Kachemak Bay .." "Oh my God!", exclaimed Wilkens. Swallowing hard, he asked, "What's the good news?" The trooper continued, "When we pulled her up, she had 12 twenty-five-pound king crabs and 6 good-sized Dungeness crabs clinging to her, and we feel you are entitled to a share in the catch." Stunned, Mr. Wilkens demanded, "If that's the good news, then what's the great news?" The trooper replied, "We're gonna pull her up again tomorrow." You know you'll be accused of sexism. You should have switched the man and the woman. But, it was funny as hell. Sexist assholes, both of you. I know 25 or 30 women who individually have accomplished more in life than you boys put together. Shut up, asshole, and pay your ****ing Taxes !! |
#5
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On Monday, March 24, 2014 8:10:51 AM UTC-7, H*a*r*r*o*l*d wrote:
The day after his wife disappeared In a kayaking accident, an Anchorage man answered his door to find two grim-faced Alaska State Troopers. "We're sorry Mr. Wilkens, but we have some information about your wife", said one of the troopers. "Tell me! Did you find her?", Wilkens exclaimed. The troopers looked at each other. One said, "We have some bad news, some good news, and some really great news. Which would you like to hear first?" Fearing the worst, Mr. Wilkens said, "Give me the bad news first." The trooper said, "I'm sorry to tell you, sir, but this morning we found your wife's body in Kachemak Bay .." "Oh my God!", exclaimed Wilkens. Swallowing hard, he asked, "What's the good news?" The trooper continued, "When we pulled her up, she had 12 twenty-five-pound king crabs and 6 good-sized Dungeness crabs clinging to her, and we feel you are entitled to a share in the catch." Stunned, Mr. Wilkens demanded, "If that's the good news, then what's the great news?" The trooper replied, "We're gonna pull her up again tomorrow." Clancy O'Dell was working at the Guinness brewery and accident drowned after fall into a huge vat of stout Ale. One of his co-workers and best friend, Tommy Callahan went to his house to tell his now widowed wife Nancy what had happened. Naturally she was in shock to hear of the dismal news, but hoping for the best for her departed husband, she said. "Oh, I hope poor Clancy was able to die quickly..." Tommy then said, "Well Nan, actually he didn't .. He hopped out at least three times to take a leak..." |
#6
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On 3/24/2014 6:44 PM, F*O*A*D wrote:
On 3/24/14, 12:05 PM, Poquito Loco wrote: On Mon, 24 Mar 2014 11:10:51 -0400, H*a*r*r*o*l*d wrote: The day after his wife disappeared In a kayaking accident, an Anchorage man answered his door to find two grim-faced Alaska State Troopers. "We're sorry Mr. Wilkens, but we have some information about your wife", said one of the troopers. "Tell me! Did you find her?", Wilkens exclaimed. The troopers looked at each other. One said, "We have some bad news, some good news, and some really great news. Which would you like to hear first?" Fearing the worst, Mr. Wilkens said, "Give me the bad news first." The trooper said, "I'm sorry to tell you, sir, but this morning we found your wife's body in Kachemak Bay .." "Oh my God!", exclaimed Wilkens. Swallowing hard, he asked, "What's the good news?" The trooper continued, "When we pulled her up, she had 12 twenty-five-pound king crabs and 6 good-sized Dungeness crabs clinging to her, and we feel you are entitled to a share in the catch." Stunned, Mr. Wilkens demanded, "If that's the good news, then what's the great news?" The trooper replied, "We're gonna pull her up again tomorrow." You know you'll be accused of sexism. You should have switched the man and the woman. But, it was funny as hell. Sexist assholes, both of you. I know 25 or 30 women who individually have accomplished more in life than you boys put together. No you don't. |
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