You must be changing your identity, Your Plonk again.
"Harry Krause" wrote in message
news:c3dhc2g=.d8c016574aac1156a9f677fe90ed1a1e@108 0836652.nulluser.com...
"In retrospect, lighting the match was my big mistake. But I was only
trying to retrieve the gerbil," Charles Stanley told bemused doctors in
the Severe Burns Unit of Hartford General Hospital.

Charlie and his partner, Backdoor Renegade, had been admitted for
emergency treatment after a felching session had gone seriously wrong.
"I pushed a cardboard tube up Backdoor's rectum and slipped Raggot, our
gerbil, in," Charlie explained. "As usual, Backdoor shouted out
"Armageddon", my cue that he'd had enough. I tried to retrieve Raggot
but he wouldn't come out again, so I peered into the tube and struck a
match, thinking the light might attract him."

At a hushed press conference, a hospital spokesman described what
happened next. "The match ignited a pocket of intestinal gas and a flame
shot out the tubing, igniting Charlie's hair and severely burning his
face. It also set fire to the gerbil's fur and whiskers, which in turn
ignited a larger pocket of gas further up the intestine, propelling the
rodent out like a cannonball."

Charlie suffered second degree burns and a broken nose from the impact
of the gerbil, while Backdoor Renegade suffered first and second degree
burns to his anus and lower intestinal tract.

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